February 2023 Horoscopes: Lured into Love by the Fae!

Time to celebrate the month of love, Horror-Tree style! Traipse along the edge of the shore, take a stroll through the woods, or venture deep underground to find your happily-ever-after fairy-tale ending! Read on to find out which denizen of fairyland will be your perfect match on this most horrifying day of the year—Valentine’s Day!

Disclaimer: These are mock horoscopes and are meant for entertainment purposes only, and are not representative of any particular person, place, or fairyland creature. Creative license of all mythology/mythological creatures also applies to these horoscopes. (But, if you really do know the way to fairyland, I’d love to tag along!)

Aquarius (January 20—February 18). As a creature seemingly belonging to the ether themselves, Aquarius will become enamored of the winged version of the fairies. They’ll try their best to keep up with these sprite-like air spirits as they flit about the flowers and trees. Aquarians may also be among the few who can actually hear the music of the fairies, and they will inevitably be drawn into the fairies’ never-ending revels. The tragedy for this sign would not be their demise from endless dancing, or the fact that they will never be able to escape the fairy realm, it’s that the fairies will force them to return to the “real” world. Romancing the Fae! Tempt your fairy sweetheart with freshly baked bread or a bowl of ripe berries placed outside your door.

Pisces (February 19—March 20). Dreamy Pisces will follow any and all currents that could lead them to a fortuitous meeting with water sprites like nixies, rusalki, and naiads. Pisces hardly needs the call of these sirens to lure them to the water’s edge, however. Since they are the embodiment of the fish, this zodiac sign lacks any fear of water, and, as a result, they’ll let themselves be drawn into the depths by these mischievous, sometimes vengeful, fairies. Even then, Pisces may not mind, as what better fate is there than to drown in the arms of the one you love? Romancing the Fae! Various mythologies not only allude to these water spirits as changeable as the tides, they’re also described as intensely jealous. Forget about any splashy romantic gestures, Pisces—simply be your charming self, and hope that does the trick. In any case, once angered, there’s probably no offering that will appease these turbulent fae.

Aries (March 20—April 19). Aries’ kindred spirit might be the violent Redcap of fairy folklore, if for no other reason than the Redcap’s delightfully bloodthirsty fashion sense. In fact, Aries may have met their match in a frenemy that dyes their cap with the blood of the people they kill. Imagine the carnage that could be wrecked across the whole of the British Isles if these two manage to fight out their differences and team up. Talk about the most terrifying “meet-cute” ever! Romancing the Fae! It’s doubtful that even a rampaging Redcap would be able to resist a big box of delicious chocolates—provided they’re dripping with the blood of Aries’ latest victim. It doesn’t get more arrow-pierced-heart romantic than that, does it?

Taurus (April 20—May 20). Domestic-minded Taurus, with their love of all things hearth and home, won’t have any trouble attracting their fairy life partner. A Taurian home is a dream-come-true for an industrious Brownie, and this thoughtful Bull will hardly give the mischievous spirit cause to play any tricks. There’s no risk of the Brownie pulling up roots and moving on under the respectful care of a Taurus. This soul connection is definitely the happily-ever-after ending of these zodiac-fae match-ups.  Romancing the Fae! While the Taurus may be tempted to spoil their in-house Brownie with lavish gifts, they should limit their thankful offerings to a bowl of milk or food placed by the modern-day equivalent of the hearth.

Gemini (May 21—June 20). In contrast to the Brownies, Gemini’s over-indulgent attitude will be welcomed by their comrades-in-fun pixies! The party peeps of the fae, Pixies are keen about dressing to impress, and they’ll love being decked out in the best clothes Gemini money can buy. Both the Gemini and the pixie have an adventurous spirit, and, although they both can get up to trouble, it’s often more of the innocent and harmless sort. No matter the shenigans they get up to, rest assured sparks will fly–and, unfortunately, perhaps set fire to whatever locale they happen to be visiting at the moment. Romancing the Fae! Gemini can hang onto the luck of the pixies by taking them on a slow cruise around the world or treat them to a tour of the finest wineries in their region.

Cancer (June 21—July 22). What fae creature could brighten a Cancer’s melancholy spirits more than a haunting banshee (bean sídhe)? Well, perhaps not brighten, per se, but at least these two could find a kinship in their shared Gloomy Gus sensibility. They could snuggle up together while reading their favorite Victorian-era novels, and then take a romantic walk out on the misty moors. However, if the Cancer is not willing to engage in the requisite wailing and keening for all the lost souls of the world; well, that might just be a deal breaker for this lovelorn banshee. Romancing the Fae! An exquisitely tragic funereal bouquet—perhaps sprinkled with some glitter-infused graveyard dust—might warm even a banshee’s chilly heart.

Leo (July 23—August 22). The long, and, perhaps, past and future lineage of a fairy-like people, the Aos sí, will certainly appeal to the cultured Leo. Not only are they said to be descended from deities, the Aos sí are also said to be a fierce people, dedicated to protecting their world from the encroachments of humans. And, if that weren’t enough to leave the Leo hoping for an invitation into their realm, one manifestation of the Aos sí is the fairy cat known as the cat-sìth. Romancing the Fae! Brash and confident Leo will definitely brave the wrath of the Aos sí by intruding into their world, should they have the opportunity to do so, but they will also ensure they will do so in full leonine glory—bearing all manner of expensive gifts for these noble fae. And, who knows, these decadent offerings, coupled with the Leo’s polished grace and manners, may even win over the discriminating heart of an Aos sí royal.

Virgo (August 23—September 22). Although they may hide it well under a cool reserve, Virgos never feel quite at ease in the world. They could secretly wish for the staunch camaraderie of friends and/or family that seems to elude them, despite their loyalty and dedication to others. These down-to-earth signs often turn the companionship of nonhuman animals or plants, and they may form stronger bonds with those companions over the people in the circles they have to move through on a daily basis. Virgos may embark on expeditions beneath the earth’s surface, trying to locate a gnome utopia that is similarly connected to both animals and nature. Romancing the Fae! Although Virgos probably exist more on the platonic friend zone spectrum, that doesn’t mean they lack a sense of deep love. It may be understated, sure, but Virgos will show their love by way of carefully prepared meal that has all their beloved’s favorite foods, or they’ll strive to make sure their animal or plant companion’s needs are fully met, always before their own.

Libra (September 23—October 22). As one of the zodiac’s most balanced signs, Libras don’t spend a lot of time questioning or doubting their romantic commitments. The bond they form with their loved one is unequivocal in nature, and is akin to the air they breathe or the water they drink. Libras have the deep roots their perfect partner is seeking, and this sign doesn’t have to do very much to attract them, except be patiently present. This is why their dryad, or tree nymph, will find them, and be content to take shelter under Libra’s protective branches. Romancing the Fae! At the very least, Libra, shimmy those leaves a little. What do you mean; you can’t shake those leaves without the help of a nice breeze? Okay, I give up trying to play matchmaker. You’re on your own!

Scorpio (October 23—November 21). Mysterious Scorpios may be intrigued by fae counterparts such as trolls or boggarts. While they may appear similar in appearance to people, both trolls and boggarts choose to live apart from them. That doesn’t mean that interaction between people and either trolls or boggarts doesn’t take place, but it is usually at the direction of these fae-like creatures. This interaction can range anywhere from simple mischief to outright harm or danger. Likewise, people have typically avoided close contact with both these spirits, but that doesn’t stop trolls and boggarts from taking what they need. Scorpios may find an awakening admiration for these independent, and strong, fae spirits, and they may put their energy into becoming a part of one, or both, these communities. Romancing the Fae! When Scorpio finally admits that they’ve fallen for one of these fae types, they may resort to shrewd negotiation and perhaps even a battle of wits as a way to win over their newfound troll or boggart love interest.

Sagittarius (November 22 – December 21). While Sagittarius is generally an explorer or adventurer, they never lose sight of the practical means needed to achieve their footloose and fancy-free lifestyle. So, if they were actually to go chasing after some mythological fairy creature, it would be one that could fund their expeditions. And, the one key thing about Sagittarius is that they have all the luck in uncovering hidden things. Or discovering creatures that can lead the Sagittarius to hidden sources of wealth, such as the underground-dwelling Knockers, or the similarly elusive Leprechaun. Romancing the Fae! Even when madly in love, the Sagittarius still manages to be practical. For them, a romantic connection is a partnership based not only on mutual respect, but 50/50 equality in all areas. The Sagittarius is so good at maintaining this equitable balance in their relationships, that even the cautious Leprechaun will be persuaded to give up the location of their hidden pot of gold, along with the key to their heart.

Capricorn (December 22—January 19). Capricorn will be driven to seek out the dwarfs deep within a mountain or cave—lured there by the promise of an internship with these exceptional craftspeople. They’ll spend many a happy year over the glowing warmth of the forge, and perfectionist Capricorn’s creations will quickly be on par with those of the more experienced dwarf artisans. In fact, the dwarfs will be so impressed with Capricorn’s willingness to take on any task, no matter how grueling or dirty, they’ll be loath to let this hard-working sign return to the external world. Capricorn may have to wait for the dwarfs to fall asleep in order to sneak off with the treasures they’ve made. Romancing the Fae! Woo your dwarf(s) with a selection of craft beer, or, better yet, a home brewing kit.

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