November 2024 Horrorscopes: Leaf Peeping with a Dash of Terror!

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Even us horror aficionados need a break from the terrifying tales we love to read (and write!). Well, at least the chance to be terrified in a different location, anyway. Check out where you should immerse yourselves in both autumnal splendor and the delightful spookiness of a haunted stay!

Disclaimer: These are mock horoscopes and are meant for entertainment purposes only, and are not specifically representative of any particular person or people.

Scorpio (October 23—November 21). As one of the most intense signs in the zodiac, Scorpio will choose one of the most meteorologically challenged locations to visit this autumn, Iceland. Sadly, Scorpio has arrived too late in the season to book a bunk at the haunted Hvítárnes hut, but they’ll have a visit to the haunted Gunnuhver Hot Springs, located at the southern tip of the Reykjanes Peninsula. I mean, a haunted hot spring that allows water sign Scorpio to take a dip while communing with its ghost? This experience promises to be the penultimate writer’s retreat, for sure! In addition to its offerings of natural beauty via tours (the Northern Lights, waterfalls, Ice Caves, and other hot springs), Iceland’s also known for the mythical beings such as trolls and fairies that also inhabit this island. The Writer’s Retreat: Scorpio often attempts to hide the fact that they are a mortal being, but the truth is they need to rest and recharge just as much as the rest of the zodiac signs. They’ll let down their guard just enough to enjoy the amenities such as the Wellness Spa at the Northern Light Inn and they’ll definitely hit pause on their writing sprints to enjoy the culinary treasures at the inn’s restaurant.

 

Sagittarius (November 22 – December 21). At the opposite end of the spectrum from Pisces, Sagittarius the adventurer takes the ultimate risks to lend authenticity to their survival horror. They prefer to skip over the intermediate autumnal season and plunge into the depths of winter. And winter is certainly what they’ll find in the region surrounding Denali, Alaska. Sagittarius will have to work hard to focus on their writing with all the exciting winter sport opportunities in the area, like skiing and snowboarding. And, while the “travel-light” Sagittarius may not be much one for shopping, they’ll wander through the former Golden North Hotel (now the site of retail shopping) in hopes of catching a glimpse of the ghost Mary. The Writer’s Retreat: The McKinley Chalet Resort offers a suitably rustic feel without skimping on luxury offerings like fine dining and dinner theatre. The rooms look to be spacious and comfortable enough to cater to a Sagittarian writer’s sense of literary adventure as well.

 

Capricorn (December 22—January 19). One characteristic of Capricorns, perhaps, is that they are endlessly and tirelessly working. Work is their vacation, and they might be among the zodiac’s most prolific writers, while the rest of us stand in our writer’s block-slash-procrastination corners watching the industrious Capricorn with awe and maybe even a touch of envy. Still, maintaining that unrelenting work drive is exhausting even for said workaholic Capricorn, and that’s exactly what they need a retreat from—work. But Capricorn’s friends and family may have to be a little sneaky when it comes to getting this stubborn goat out of the office. Create a fictional writer’s conference in, say, New Orleans. And by conference, I mean the Bayou Bacchanal that takes place in early November! But if that Caribbean-style street party is too wild for Capricorn, there’s plenty of other activities to help inspire another 20 horror/speculative fiction books: evening ghost tours, cemetery tours, visits to the Museum of Death, and the more laidback Tremé Creole Gumbo Festival that combines gumbo eating with brass band music. Just make sure to “accidently” forget to load the Capricorn’s case with their laptop and hide their phone at the soonest available opportunity. The Writer’s Retreat: Not only is the Hotel Montelone purported to be haunted, it’s also “haunted” by its literary history as well. Several of the rooms are named after authors who have stayed there in the past.

 

Aquarius (January 20—February 18). For an Aquarius, the topics of hauntings and ghosts can often be too literal a concept. Places can be haunted by energies, by memories, by feelings, and by historical events. Their literary creations tend to likewise veer into more profound and philosophical concepts as expressed via horror and other speculative fiction genres. Also, the Aquarius lives for writing retreats and solitude. Their chosen destination will offer little in the way of external distractions like sightseeing and haunted ghost tours. Although not even the lofty Aquarius will be able to resist standing “at the corner” in Winslow, Arizona, and taking the requisite selfie. The Writer’s Retreat: Once they’ve landed in Winslow, they will gravitate to the sanctuary of the La Posada Hotel; the closest the Aquarian can come to a self-contained environment without embarking on a pilgrimage to a remote monastery. There’s a cohesive design to the hotel’s exterior and interior, there’s a mindfulness to the garden, and there’s both a restaurant and a martini bar within the hotel, and all of these factors work to eliminate distractions that could prevent the Aquarius from completing their next masterpiece. And, if they need inspiration, they can simply step outside and drink in all the air and sky they need to feel refreshed and centered before returning inside to a location steeped with all the notables that have also passed through the hotel doors.

 

Pisces (February 19—March 20). For this particular sign, autumn may not be all pumpkins and spice. They may become despondent over the seasonal shift as the autumnal weather is a preview to the winter frost. Pisces yearns for an eternal Spring; blooming flowers, blooming romance, and happy-go-lucky birds and bees shaking off the winter torpor. Their speculative fiction, even as it may be a little melancholy at times, will still have a silver lining to the tale. Pisces’ writing retreat of their dreams will take root in Southern Australia, ideally near the Hunter Valley Gardens, where they can bring their notebook as they bask in each of the themed gardens at the site. The only problem will be in getting the Pisces to leave, but even that will be inevitable once the Australian autumn begins to show itself. The Writer’s Retreat: Luckily for Pisces, there’s the option to stay at the Mercure Hotel Resort that is actually located within the gardens themselves. It’s most likely not haunted, but the Pisces imagination is fecund enough to populate the gardens with all sorts of spectral and fanciful creatures.

 

Aries (March 20—April 19). Aries will find Portland, Oregon, irresistible this time of year. Between the book festival, haunted houses, anime conventions, a Dias de La Muertos festival, holiday food and gift markets, alongside year-round ghost tours* and drag events, Aries will have plenty of fodder (and people-watching opportunities) for their speculative fiction stories. Plus, they’ll even find some inspiration by way of another kind of “spirit” via the Wine Country Thanksgiving. But the most appealing event of them all? It’s Roller Derby season, and the Aries will get to experience the Rose City Rollers in all their brutal-bout glory! The Writer’s Retreat: Aries will be recording copious notes in their handheld recording device to use when they finally settle down to write in their hotel room. Before giving that up as a lost cause, that is, and abandoning Portland in all its wild and weird glory for the quieter Astoria and the charms of the haunted Hotel Elliot.

*I actually went on the Haunted Shanghai Tunnel Tour. It was awesome!

 

Taurus (April 20—May 20). I’ll give you some hints on where Taurus will seek out the perfect autumn adventure. Hint #1: “Kindred Spirits”. Hint #2: They’ll be travelling there during “November—the month of crimson sunsets…”*. Give up? Oh, all right, then. The Taurus has packed up their carpetbag and headed off for Prince Edward Island to discover more about the place that Anne of Green Gables called “home”. Because what could be more inspiring than the story of a girl who found her “happily ever after home”? Still, their trip is a double-edged sword for the Taurian author, as they will have a fully booked Anne of Green Gables/L.M. Montgomery sightseeing tour (not to mention a tour of the purportedly haunted Yeo House) that will leave them little time to work on their fantasy series. The Writer’s Retreat: While it may be tempting for the Taurus to break with domestic tradition and stay in the more urban Holman Grand Hotel resort in downtown Charlottetown, they won’t lose touch with their dream to become a writer as well known as L.M. Montgomery. They’ll opt for the more peaceful, albeit also potentially haunted, Shaw’s Hotel, for the solitude they need to participate in NaNoWriMo.

*L.M. Montgomery, Anne of Green Gables

 

Gemini (May 21—June 20). Geminis are all about variety…and quirkiness! So, naturally, they’ll drink up everything that Muskogee, Oklahoma, has to offer. Their first stop? The Boare’s Heade Feaste at the Castle of Muskogee! Geminis may be so charmed by the medieval-style feast that they’ll extend their vacation to experience the Castle’s other seasonal events such as the “Castle Christmas” and the “Polar Express Pajama Party”. And, because Gemini also likes to swing from one extreme to the other, they’ll love the more spooky side of Muskogee, with several haunted sites and buildings to explore, with, or without, a ghost tour guide! The Writer’s Retreat: Even active Gemini needs to “get away from it all”, even if it’s for a space of an hour. They’ll find the peace and respite they need to jot down their story ideas at the historic B&B, the Whitlock Wishouse, before dashing off to their next adventure!

 

Cancer (June 21—July 22). While it may lack the blazing colours of autumn, the southern United States is no stranger to the spooky magic of the season. Oak trees draped with ghostly Spanish moss, the candy-corn smell of the night-blooming cereus, the slow-moving mist drifting across brackish swamp water, and the slightly sinister trill of the Eastern Screech Owl; these can inspire the speculative fiction writer just as much as a northern autumn can, if not more. And, among all the zodiac signs, Cancer is probably the one most predisposed to write in the Southern Gothic genre. They’ll pack up their vintage suitcase and head off to explore the town of Micanopy, cloistered in a less-developed area of the Florida panhandle. Upon arrival, they’ll immediately immerse themselves in the marshy magic of the Paynes Prairie Preserve State Park while trying to resist the temptation to stay hidden there for all time. After shaking off the mesmerizing spell of the swamps, they’ll poke around in Micanopy’s antique stores before strolling through the Wacahoota Cemetery in search of the local spirits. The Writer’s Retreat: After sightseeing, Cancer will settle into their elegant room in the historic Herlong Mansion, hoping to encounter the B&B’s resident ghost(s) during their writing sessions.

 

Leo (July 23—August 22). Even showstopper Leo needs to take a break from the spotlight. After putting in an appearance in spookily iconic Sleepy Hollow, they’ll jet up to New Paltz, New York, a small town with enough vibrancy to reassure Leo they aren’t missing out on something “bigger and better”. Besides, what could be more appealing to a sophisticated Lion than to wander the old-timey streets lined with historic homes—and shopping in carefully curated stores while they’re at it? New Paltz is not only rife with selfie opps, there’s also plenty of outdoor activities to keep Leo in top physical condition. The area’s fiery leaf displays are the perfect backdrop to showcase Leo’s equally vibrant sense of style. The Writer’s Retreat: Speaking of style, Leo will find the luxury they are accustomed to with their stay at a Victorian-style castle, where they can nurture body, mind, and spirit. It’s just what their developmental editor recommended! Okay, maybe not, but Leo is sure to find inspiration at the historic (and lavish!) Mohonk Mountain House, complete with spa and plenty of autumnal activities that will take Leo’s mind off their less-than-stylish manuscript with its saggy middle. Unless, of course, Leo realizes they’ve missed the “Haunted Huguenot Street” meet-and-greet with the local ghostly VIPs by a few days. If you’re Leo’s travel advisor, be prepared to placate your angry feline!

 

Virgo (August 23—September 22). Virgo’s ideal getaway will be one that combines the practical with the low key. Shelburne, Vermont, gives them the opportunity to meander through the region’s natural areas as well as the intimate tourist attractions like the Shelburne Museum and the Vermont Teddy Bear Factory. With their new cuddly friend in tow, Virgo will linger over the town’s culinary wonders, sampling fine wines at the Shelburne Vineyard and ales at the Fiddlehead Brewing Company—in moderation, of course. Virgo would hate to be too tipsy to appreciate the Winter Lights also at the Shelburne Museum, where they’ll also hope to spot one of the museum’s ghostly inhabitants. The Writer’s Retreat: Although health-conscious Virgo won’t lack in suitable food selections from Shelburne’s restaurants, they’ll love the wide range of breakfast options offered by the Heart of the Village Inn that cater to specialty diets. Virgos will also appreciate the old-world Victorian décor, which might just inspire their next gothic horror novel, perhaps featuring a teddy bear gone bad.

 

Libra (September 23—October 22). Libras love the ocean in all seasons, in all of its different moods and forms. While they may have initially chosen Maine as a way to follow in a notable horror author’s footsteps, it soon became a favourite place of theirs to visit in the off season. This fall season, they’re planning to explore the city of Kennebunkport—by kayak and by boat as much as possible in order to channel the mysteries of the ocean into their own eco-horror drenched tales (revenge of the lobsters, anyone?). The Writer’s Retreat: Once back on land, they intend to maximize their time off as much as possible by checking into the haunted Kennebunk Inn to finish their own tome of terror. Unless, of course, they get distracted by autumnal activities like leaf peeping and apple picking!

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